Friday, January 11, 2008

Bored.

I am hanging in there for the final two hours of a work week that has seemed epic in length. I can't say what in particular has made it seem that long, other than the fact that once I plowed through all of my e-mails from the beginning of the week, I found myself all caught up in short order. There is one thing I have left to do that I cannot, because for some reason my login and password for that particular tool is not working. That task in and of itself will probably take two or three hours... and will have to be left until next week, now.

I do NOT do well when I am bored. It's not that I don't want to be busy, it's just at the moment I don't have anything much to work on. I suppose I could manufacture some busy work, but it will be a useless expenditure of time and will not produce any worthwhile result.

I'm talking WorkSpeak, now. Lookit me go.

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Monday, January 07, 2008

Blissful ignorance at an end.

339 = the number of e-mails awaiting me when I logged in for work this morning. I guess when you divide that number by the number of days it's been since I've been at work (16), that's only 21 messages per day. I'll be gosh-darned if I'm going to log in on my vacation just to maintain my e-mails, though. Sixteen days of blissful ignorance is worth the three or four hours it's going to take me to plow through these and weed out the urgent ones.

I spent two hours yesterday picking up land mines in the back yard (I swear I'm going to stop feeding those dogs), then scrubbing out, rinsing, and re-filling the hot tub (it's been empty since shortly after Thanksgiving). Now I need the hot tub to relax the muscles in my back that are screaming because of yesterday's activities.

It's been raining off and on since last night, and the northern elevations are getting snow like gangbusters. We will probably do some in-state skiing in the coming weekends. And then need the hot tub again. Because we are old and out of shape and skiing is a young, shapely person's sport. Yet, we are game. And perhaps foolish.

Today's Manic Monday activities include: work (natch), laundry, grocery shopping at two different stores, picking up critters for the critters, picking up prescriptions, cleaning the kitchen, cleaning the cat closet, taking back the rental movies, and working out. Aaaaand soaking in the hot tub.

Calvin and I went to see the new National Treasure movie. It was fun, historically inaccurate, and highly improbable. We did not go to see a history lesson, however, and so we enjoyed.

My husband and I now know what we want to be when we grow up. Bartenders. We shall sell and get out of Arizona, buy a condo or loft in the Old Port in Portland, Maine, and get jobs within walking distance as bartenders. You'd all be shocked at how completely serious we are about this. We even have a bartendress friend at our oft-visited local that is willing to teach us the ropes. At the end of this year, or the beginning of next, we shall begin to make plans in earnest. We're just waiting for the housing market to turn back around so we can get enough equity out of our property.

Finally, I am determined to lose thirty pounds. My plan is to eat 1000 calories Monday through Friday (easing up but not going overboard on the weekends), work out six days a week, and finally do something about this nonsense. I'm serious this time. No, really. I'll stand on the scale in front of Calvin if I have to in order to kick myself in my own ass and get some motivation.

For crying out loud.

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Friday, December 14, 2007

Possessed

I can't call my truck a lemon. The strict definition of a lemon is a vehicle that has been serviced multiple times in a given timeframe for the same issue. My truck has been serviced multiple times for multiple issues.

I shall call it... a pineapple.

Off the top of my head, it has gone in for A/C issues, a weird squeaking sound coming from one of the vents, battery issues, molding separating from the door frames, stereo/speaker issues, and starting issues. To that, I must add...

POLTERGEISTS.

So late last week when I got into the truck to drive it, like I always do, it dinged at me, like it always does. Usually it's because I haven't buckled my seatbelt fast enough to satisfy it. But the belt was buckled. I looked at the dash, and the message said, "PASSENGER DOOR AJAR". So I got out, circled the truck, opened and FIRMLY shut each door, climbed back in, buckled up, and put it in reverse.

"DING DING DING DING DING DING DING DING!!!!!" (There are always 8 dings.) "PASSENGER DOOR AJAR." So I got out again, circled the truck opening and shutting doors again, got back in, buckled up, hit reverse...

"DING DING DING DING DING DING DING DING!!!!!"

So now I realize there's a sensor problem with one of the (NOT ajar) doors. Because the truck thinks one of the doors isn't closed, the auto locks don't work properly (they usually lock when the truck is put into drive, and unlock automatically when the truck is put into park).

Along with this issue is a stripped gear in one of the rear passenger windows, thereby leaving it stuck in the "down" position when utilized and necessitating manual levitation to "roll" it up again. So I figured I was going to take the truck back in (again) anyway, and would have this additional issue to add to the list.

So, that was last week. Fast forward to today, when Jen and I went to lunch at Red Robin. The truck did its ding-thing when we got in to drive off, but otherwise acted normally on the way to the restaurant. We had a nice lunch with an EXTREMELY attentive waitress who kept taking my half-drunk Coke away and replacing it with a full, new glass of Coke because she couldn't stand the thought of me drinking watered-down soda. Jen's tea got refilled four times. We finally had to leave before we floated away.

We got in the truck. It had its usual identity crisis when it identified its door as a jar. I ignored it, until about halfway back to work. "DING DING DING DING DING DING DING DING!!!!" The truck decided to remind me that the door was ajar, having previously been satisfied to just tell me once, right when I got in the truck. Then, "Shh-click! Click. Shh-click. Click. Shudder shudder shudder shu shu shu shhh-click!" "DING DING DING DING DING DING DING DING!!!!"

The doors started locking and unlocking themselves furiously. The dinger dinged over and over and OVER AND OVER. The message center lit up with the "PASSENGER DOOR IS AJAR" message, then disappeared, then re-appeared, then disappeared. As we were driving along, this chaos erupted that prompted Jen and I to completely lose our shit and crack up laughing.

"The truck! It's possessed!" Jen cried.

"Poltergeists!" I yelled back.

"Shh-click! (DING DING DING) Click. Shh-click. Click. (DING DING DING) Shudder shudder shudder shu shu shu shhh-click! DING DING DING DING DING DING DING DING!!!!"

By this time I could hardly see the road, I was laughing so hard. Jen was all, "Don't hit that truck!" I'm fairly sure we looked a sight driving along bawling laughing, weaving along on the road.

We're supposed to get our Christmas tree tonight. THAT should be fun.

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Friday, November 30, 2007

Sickyland

A graphic representation of how likely it is that Jen and I will become ill within the next week:



She just physically propelled me to the water fountain and force-fed me an Airborne. Perhaps she has saved my life. As it is, I really feel like I should be wearing a surgical mask.

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Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Le sigh.

Today, I am tired.

Also, someone stole the clock from my desk at work.

People, in general, suck. Thieves, specifically, can bite me.

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Sunday, November 25, 2007

It's always bad for me when Calvin has had a nap

He slammed his hands over the keyboard just as I got done typing the title, which inadvertantly published just the title, and thus he was thwarted despite his own efforts at hiding his true nature. Good has once again conquored over evil. And you all have another small insight into just what I deal with, on a minute-by-minute basis, in being married to him.

The man can be a supreme pest. Cute, but a pest. With all the post-nap energy.

Back to work tomorrow, which thrills me about -->this<-- much. Back to being on the computer every day - I actually managed to stay off-line for three whole days during my vacation. Back to taking my vitamins, working out, eating right, drinking water, trying to get at least ten minutes or so of sunlight a day, hauling out the lotion since it's bone dry in the state now that the cool weather has finally hit. Back to taking conscious care of myself, instead of just lounging about in my PJ's and convincing myself that this much rest is healthy, really.

It could be worse. I only have, like, three weeks until my next vacation. More than two weeks off with that one. Still, I can find it in myself to whine just a little bit that it's back to the grind tomorrow.

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Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Totally.

OMFG, you guys, I am, like, sooooo bored.

AcronymCo is probably not unique in its holiday work-or-lack-thereof cycle. Pretty much from November 12th until January 7th, there is not a lot of useful work done. I mean, sure, business continues. The fires are fought and the year-end whatnot is wrapped up. The day to day busywork is accomplished so that one can say, "See! I did (xyz) today! I earned my paycheck! Mostly!" But there is a severe and obvious lack of motivation. People are doing their Christmas shopping on-line. People are planning their holiday meals. People are counting down the days to their vacations on one hand. The lack of interest in, I don't know, starting anything new or dealving into a project, well, it is staggering.

Take today, for example. I did the necessary this morning. Urgent things were followed up on and people were updated. I was a Good Corporate Citizen. But the day is creeping by so slowly that I do believe it's now going backwards. It's 12:34 right now, and when I look again it will be 10:05.

I am down to my Least Favorite Things left to be done on my list. The things that are left until there is absolutely nothing else left to do. That moment has arrived. I can feel my brain cells leaking out of my head as I type this, and not in a good way.

I am thankful to be gainfully employed. I just wish that employment was somewhat less Corporate, and somewhat more, oh, Tropical. With drinks. And little umbrellas.

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Wednesday, November 07, 2007

Yet another day in the life

I periodically like to record a "day in the life" entry. I like to go back and compare them and see what's the same, what's different, and what is proof positive that I am VERY FIRMLY set in my ways. (For instance, compare today's entry to this one, or this one.)

5:30 a.m. - Alarm goes off for Calvin. I grunt and roll over.

6:18 a.m. - Calvin's phone rings. And rings. He comes running in from the other room to answer it. I grunt and roll over.

6:25 a.m. - Calvin kisses me goodbye. I grunt and roll over.

6:36 a.m. - Zoe prrrrowts in my ear. And touches me on the face with her wet nose. And pat-pats me on my face with her paw. And reminds me of this entry. I scritch her and roll over.

6:40 a.m. - Oz jumps up on the bed. Zoe beats me to death trying to dive off the bed, and under it. Oz follows.

6:40:15 a.m. - Growl. Hiss. Growl.

6:40:25 a.m. - HISS. GROOOOWWWWLLL. SPAT!

6:40:30 a.m. - I holler at the cats and thump the headboard. One runs out, I don't see which but I assume it's Zoe.

6:50 a.m. - Zoe prrrrowts in my ear. And touches me on the face with her wet nose. And pat-pats me on my face with her paw. I squint at the clock, debate getting up 10 minutes early. Dismiss it as a bad idea.

7:05 a.m. - The alarm goes off again. I mutter something that sounds like, "This is bullshit." I turn off the alarm, start the shower.

7:05 - 7:15 a.m. - Wash face, shampoo, conditioner, wash body, rinse rinse rinse, dry. Pick out and put on clothes (blue jeans, white T, maroon zip-up hoodie, socks, sneakers).

7:15 - 7:20 a.m. - Acquire coffee. Coooooffffffeeeeee. Take vitamins and prescriptions.

7:20 - 7:40 a.m. - Hold conversation with Zoe (who likes to sit on the edge of the tub while I perform my ablutions) while moussing and combing out hair, moisturizing face, cleaning out ears, putting on deodorant, putting on makeup, drying and styling hair, brushing teeth.

7:40 - 7:55 a.m. - Put water in snake's tank, turn on waterfall and UV light. Put water in dog's dish outside, give them a cookie and pets all around. Put canned food in dish in Oz's closet, put canned food in Zoe's dish in the weight room. Fill up indoor water dish. Shred summer squash and tear up dandelion greens, put a handful in Cheeto's dish and a handful in Lucy's dish. Turn off A/C, lock bedroom doors, defrost two slices of spelt bread and slather with cream cheese, put in baggie and then in work bag. Take pork chops out of the freezer to thaw for dinner tonight. Grab bag, keys, badge, out the door and in the truck and on the way to work.

7:55 - 8:00 a.m. - Drive to work. Listen to one of the TUS mix CD's.

8:00 - 8:10 a.m. - Get to desk, put down bag, dock and start up laptop, grab water cup and tea mug, rinse them out in the bathroom, head down to the cafeteria to fill up water cup and get hot water and honey for tea, head back to my desk, log into the network, put tea bag in hot water, settle down with my baggie 'o breakfast.

8:10 - 8:30 a.m. - Answer e-mails, eat breakfast.

8:30 - 9:00 a.m. - Start this journal entry and update with morning activities.

9:01 a.m. - Stop! Potty time!

9:05 a.m. - Start balancing checkbook and paying bills.

9:15 - 9:35 a.m. - Life is interrupted by an AcronymCo fire drill. Lights flashing! Alarms blaring! People filing out of the fire exits like lemmings! Lots of standing around in the parking lot while the building sweep is conducted. Then, more filing! More lemmings! Aaaaaand I'm back at my desk.

9:35 - 9:40 a.m. - Take a phone call and answer questions.

9:40 - 10:30 a.m. - Resume paying bills and balancing checkbook. Run a Quicken report to show Calvin how much money we spend on groceries and on going out to eat. Boggle a bit.

10:30 - 11:00 a.m. - Enough of that nonsense. Answer e-mails, place PO's, field phone calls (hi, Calvin!), get annoyed by a new cube neighbor moving into our territory, NOT OF OUR GROUP. Grr.

11:05 a.m. - Stop! Potty time!

11:07 - 11:15 a.m. - Go down to the cafeteria, procure a Caesar salad, stand in the LOOOOOONG line forever as the POS system dials out for each individual credit card transaction. Contemplate that the flow of purchases is faster with cash, in direct contradiction to the current Visa commercials.

11:15 - 11:25 a.m. - Back at my desk, start to eat, phone rings. Chat with Calvin. He tells me things about an FX 40 and a Niagra something and sensors and whatnot. I'm lost.

11:25 a.m. - 12:05 p.m. - Continue eating. Read Bitchypoo. Peruse ICHC. Read Dysfunction Junction. Read Chaos Theory. Check in on Laurell K. Hamilton. Read 6YearMed. Read Because I Said So. Read Crazy Aunt Purl. Read Miss Britt. Determine that I shall use the phrase, "What le fuck?" in the near future. Read Avitable. Read BurtsStache. Pry off my wedding ring, take off my watch, apply hand lotion. Put ring and watch back on. Read Sunday Undies. Update this entry.

12:05 - 12:25 p.m. - Turn, with a sigh, back to the 140 e-mails awaiting response, deletion, and/or categorization in my in-box. Method involves sorting e-mails by subject to group all of the FW's and RE:'s and RE:RE:RE's together to find the latest message in the string, and delete the others. Manage to weed e-mails down to 87 by using this method. Then I start back in chronological order, oldest first, and disseminate as appropriate.

12:25 - 12:30 p.m. - Recall something Calvin mentioned to me, and check Hotmail. See message from Maine Lobster Direct about a deal on live lobsters. Place our Christmas dinner order (6 1-1/4 pounders, 4 lbs of king crab legs) for nearly $80 less than I was expecting.

12:30 - 12:35 p.m. - Update this entry some more.

12:35 - 12:50 p.m. - Do work stuff: run consignment inventory usage report for the last 12 months for one of my suppliers; approve request for new part number to be added to inventory; set up new part number in the stockroom database.

12:50 - 12:55 p.m. - Stop! Potty time! Grab a piece of candy from the dish on the admin's desk on my way back.

12:55 - 1:40 p.m. - Do more work stuff: Check my queue for any purchase orders that need to be placed, find three and submit them; dig out iPod and headphones to combat the boredom ("I believe it's time for me to fly..."); take pain pills to combat the headache I've had since I woke up, curse being a woman; terminate a requisition; ("I've heard people say that... too much of anything is no good for you..."); weed through e-mails some more, enlist a CM's assistance for an issue with a non-responsive supplier; ("Tell me whatcha eat, I might cook for you..."); determine if a discontinued chemical is going to effect the factory; ("Spent my days with a woman unkind... smoked my stuff and drank all my wine..."); request a quote from a vendor for a needed part; ("Welcome to your life... there's no turning back..."); research a vendor payment issue and try to communicate clear instructions in a different way than the clear instructions I sent to them last week; curse Accounts Payable; ("Every time I look in the mirror, all these lines on my face getting clearer..."); ("You own the money, you control the witness..."); revise the prices on a purchase order; ("Now if you're feelin' kinda low 'bout the dues you been payin'..."); adjust part prices in stockroom database; ("You know what the midwest is? Young and restless...").

1:40 - 1:45 p.m. - Stop! Potty time! Then walk down to the windows and press my nose against the glass before returning to my desk. Contemplate the lack of Vitamin D in my life.

1:45 - 2:25 p.m. - Do more work stuff: ("I can play the guitar like a motherfuckin' riot."); adjust a purchase order; request tracking information for an overdue shipment from a supplier; ("She's a craze you'd endorse, she's a powerful force..."); complete a feedback survey for my manager; ("And she won't give up, cuz she's seventeen. She's a frozen fire..."); reconcile an on-time delivery report; ("Far four winds blow, there's trouble and it won't go..."); approve a Level 2 purchase order; ("I got the call today, didn't wanna hear, but I knew that it would come..."); make updates to yet another purchase order; look up status of requested order; ("And here's to you Mrs. Robinson, Jesus loves you more than you will know..."); make change to yet ANOTHER PO; ("Well I fight authority, authority always wins..."); research parts in inventory to see if we can share with another site in need; compile shipping memo to share parts; ("Oh what a night, late December back in '63..."); edit a form for a new part request.

2:25 p.m. - E-mail count is now down to 23, eleven of which are in "green flag" status (my code for "waiting for someone to get their thumb out of their butt and respond to me").

2:26 - 2:35 p.m. - Sigh heavily. Update this entry some more. Think about going home early, because, well, feh.

2:35 p.m. - Stop! Potty time! Which strangely coincided with fourteen other women's need to pee.

2:40 - 3:10 p.m. - Decide a mental break is in order. Read Draw the Girl. Read Body of Work. Check ICHC for new pics. Look at pictures of Chuck on Dooce. Go back to where I left off yesterday in my Colloquial archives.

3:10 - 3:15 p.m. - Talk to Calvin on the phone. He's mad at me because he wanted me to make ANOTHER phone call to the title company (we're still trying to get the "free and clear" title for Michael's motorcycle) to find out the status. I've mailed them once, faxed them twice, and had phone conversations with them FIVE different times. So today? I just... didn't. I don't know why, I just didn't do it.

3:15 - 3:45 p.m. - Talk to a manager at the Oregon AcronymCo plant. Discuss a training plan for a new buyer over there. Discuss plans with my manager. Decide upon a series of teleconferences rather than a face-to-face meeting.

3:45 p.m. - Close enough to 4:00. Shut down my computer, grab my stuff, and I'm outta here.

3:45 - 4:10 p.m. - Drive home, again listening to one of the TUS mix CD's. Arrive home, dump my bag on the bed, say hi to Calvin, get run over seven times by Portia saying "Hi! Hi! Hi there! Hi!" Change into comfy clothes.

4:11 p.m. - Lay down for "just a minute" on the very comfy bed.

5:14 p.m. - Wake up with a snort. Zoe prrrrowts in my ear. And touches me on the face with her wet nose. And pat-pats me on my face with her paw.

5:15 - 6:10 p.m. - Go out into the living room, sit on the couch and put Calvin's feet in my lap, tickle his feet while he naps. Watch last week's episode of Bones.

6:11 - 6:15 p.m. - Get a call from Marie about some "weird shape light thingy" lighting up on her dashboard. I have no idea.

6:15 - 7:35 p.m. - Ride the motorcycle over to DarkHorse with Calvin. Have some Moosedrool and some grub. Watch the Suns lose. Watch a couple of poker games going on in front of the bar. Get annoyed by the guy sitting next to us. Pay up and head home again.

7:35 - 9:00 p.m. - Hug Marie for cleaning the kitchen - a task I didn't look forward to doing when I got home. Be amused as she cannot stick with just washing the dishes, but also has to reorganize all of the cupboards and closets. Feed the dogs. Get the mail. Flip through "Cover and Bake" and "Baking Illustrated". Get the coffee ready for tomorrow. Change into my jammies. Sit on the couch typing this while half-watching "Let's Go To Prison". Shut down the snake's and beardies' tanks.

9:00 - 10:00 p.m. - Watch miscellaneous TV. Get Calvin's clothes together for work tomorrow. Put my breakfast and lunch together for tomorrow. Set the alarm. Go to bed.

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Wednesday, August 22, 2007

It hurts to watch you work the room

Fallout Boy is suiting my mood today.

I am so ready for summer to be over. I'm being forced to be inside in a worse way than snow ever did to me. Living for winter is totally throwing off my circadian rhythm. My inclination is to greet May with something close to ecstacy and October with something akin to dread. Right now I just wish to fast foward to, say, November 16th. That's a Friday. In November. When it will likely be in the 80's here. The 80's are acceptable when one is writing from 112. I would wish it even cooler, though... say the 50's that November represents in Maine.

Sigh.

I wish that when I shut the house down for the night (lights out, doors locked, TV off, etc.) it stayed that way. Instead I usually wake up (am awakened) several times in the night and discover Michael watching TV, talking on the phone, talking to other people in my house in the middle of the night, fixing food in the kitchen, going in and out of the back door a MILLION times a night because he's a dirty nasty smoker... at all hours. Today when Calvin's cell went off at 5:00 a.m. (GROWL), the TV in the living room was still on. The thing is, I can't sleep in a settled manner knowing that there are still people coming and going and stirring and MAKING NOISE all through the night. Will the front door still be locked, the garage door closed? Will someone accidentally let the cat out? Will I emerge from my bedroom at 2:00 in the morning in order to scold the noise-maker, only to discover three or four strangers along with said noise-maker? My home is not my own, and it's really frickin' getting to me.

I am doing purposeful things to adjust my state of mind. Today at lunch I walked the route through the campus buildings (see aforementioned note about having to stay inside, grumpety grump) and listened to my iPod. I just had to get away from my desk, because people (for some strange reason) are straight PISSING ME RIGHT OFF TODAY. The tedium of my job sometimes grips me in such an overwhelming manner that I am extremely close to giving in to the temptation to scream my head off, right here in the middle of the cubicle jungle. Or else I will kill that annoying cubicle neighbor of mine that talks at the top of his lungs all day every day and condescends to every person that he communicates with. Or maybe I'll send that nasty-gram BEFORE proof reading it, walking away, walking back, reading it again, saving it without sending it, walking away, walking back, editing it to remove all the references to "fucker" and "shithead" and "total complete asshat", and sending a final and much more professionally acceptable version.

Calvin is having, if anything, a much worse day (and week, actually), than I am. We have once again talked and dreamed of selling everything, leaving Arizona, and living off the land somewhere. Perhaps work for a convenience store. Grow our own food. Learn to like the taste of squirrel. Somewhere with fresh air and peaches. Something, anything, to end this rat race that we are currently enduring. We know we are blessed with great jobs that support our lovely home. But really, a double-wide out in the woods somewhere is starting to look MIGHTY appealing.

Technically, I own the land in Maine that my sister and her family currently reside upon. I could blaze a driveway and dig a well and set up shop right next door to them, and regale you all with tales of our mighty fine adventures. With the naked dancing around the bonfire with the beer and the chickens. Ay-yup.

Current "Fave" iPod playlist:

The (After) Life of the Party - Fallout Boy
Animal - Def Leppard
Black Sweat - Prince
Born to Run - Springstein
Dancing Queen - Abba
Shipping up to Boston - Dropkick Murphys
Everyday - Dave Matthews
Eyes - Rogue Wave
Girlfriend - Avril Lavigne
Glory Days - Springstein
Guitar - Prince
Hey There Delilah - Plain White T's
Hot in the City - Billy Idol
I Don't Wanna Be In Love - Good Charlotte
I Love a Rainy Night - Eddie Rabbit
I'm a Loser Baby - Beck
Makes Me Wonder - Maroon Five
Me Love - Sean Kingston (thanks to Marie for that one!)
Move Along - All American Rejects
Number One in Heaven - Nemesis
Oh, It's Love - Hellogoodbye
On the Dark Side - Eddie and the Cruisers
Read My Mind - The Killers
Scotty Doesn't Know - Lustra (Eurotrip Soundtrack)
Short Skirt/Long Jacket - Cake
So Alive - Love and Rockets
Steal My Sunshine - Len
The Story - Brandi Carlile
Sunday Mornings - Maroon Five
Thanks for the Memories - Fallout Boy
This Ain't a Scene, It's an Arms Race - Fallout Boy
Turn on Me - The Shins
The Way You Make Me Feel - Michael Jackson
Where Does the Good Go - Tegan and Sara (my new favorite song)
Word Up - Korn

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Wednesday, August 08, 2007

Ain't nobody's bidness but mine and my baby's

I just totally got busted dancing in my cubicle.

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Tuesday, August 07, 2007

In short...

You know, as soon as I got the answer back from that company in Maine, I completely ceased to think about it at all any more. As many of you probably suspect, they did decide to go with another candidate for the position. As I told Dawn during one of our recent EPIC e-mail marathons, "They shall RUE THE DAY that they chose someone else!"

I wasn't even really that disappointed or upset, which is probably why I totally brain-farted about posting about it. When the contemplation of such a large life change is in the works, things hardly ever work out exactly the way you want them to on the first try.

So! C'est la vie. We have goals a-plenty right here in this house, right here in Arizona, to keep us occupied until this mythical Life Changing Event takes shape.

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Monday, July 09, 2007

Cornucopia

Hi guys. A lot of you have e-mailed/commented, asking if I've heard anything back from that company in Maine that I interviewed with a couple of weeks ago. I haven't heard anything yet, but they did mention not to expect to hear from them until sometime around the 9th of July. Which is today. So I should know something soon, and you guys will be the second to know. Behind Calvin, of course.

I hate doctors completely. Absolutely. With the white-hot passion of a thousand burning suns. I went to my GP on Friday to see if they could do something about the screwed up thyroid levels appearing on my blood test results, so that I wouldn't have to wait until the 31st to see the endocrinologist (see entry on 6/26). I have almost all the symptoms of hyPOthyroidism (lethargy, weight gain, body aches, among others). Yet the doc said that the test results show that I should be experiencing hypERthyroidism, whose symptoms (heart palpitations, high blood pressure, excess of energy, weight loss, among others) are the exact opposite of how I've been feeling.

Here's the part where I got mad. She said that I'm probably depressed, and should take meds. I told her, "No, I know what that feels like. I've been on anti-depression and anti-anxiety meds before, and went off them back in November. I'm not going back on them, this is different."

She just smiled at me in a condescending fashion, said, "I think you should consider it, since that would be in keeping with all of your symptoms," and pat-patted me on the arm. As if to say, "You can't fix the problem until you admit there is one." Bitch. You all KNOW what hell I went through with my depression and anxiety, and for someone to suggest that I'm in denial or don't know what I talking about REALLY cheesed me.

She wanted to order up yet another round of blood tests and a follow-up appointment, which I absolutely flat-out refused. I am God-awful sick and tired of getting poked with needles. The year is only half over and I've had at LEAST six or seven blood tests already, for a variety of things. And I'm sure the endocrinologist (who I am still seeing) will order another round, since their office wasn't the one who provided this latest blood test, and it will be a couple of months old by the time I finally see them.

Not to mention the fact that each doctor's office uses different sets of ranges and parameters to measure blood and body chemistry, which I find to be the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard of. Where is the industry standardization? How do they expect to measure results over time, across disciplines, if their methods of measurement are all different? How do they expect to identify trends? I can't compare the blood tests that I got from the GP, the OB-GYN, and the Gastro doc because they use different measurements and scales for the same labs. It boggles the engineer and data analyst in me.

Let's see, what else? Ah, yes. Back on the 29th, Calvin and I celebrated our 5th wedding anniversary (see here for the entry I did about the wedding). What better way to celebrate than to eat steak, and watch steak! We went to The Keg for some blue cheese crusted filet mignon (uh. mah. gah.), then went to the Jobing.com Arena to watch the pro bull riding competition. I'd never been to any sort of bull riding or rodeo event, even though I've lived in the "Wild Wild West" for coming up on up on fourteen years.

I tell you what, we had a pretty darned good time. I was rooting for the bulls the whole time, of course. We sat next to a group of guys that were out for a buddy's birthday, and ended up gabbing a bit with them and sharing the flask-o'-whiskey around. There was a very pretty girl with a low cut top and hiked up assets sitting in the section below us, and every time she would climb up (and then back down, natch) the stairs on a beer run, the guys would all yell, "Puppies!" Yeesh.

Anyway, we took a billion and three blurry bull pictures. Bulls standing on their heads. Bulls standing on their tails. Bulls leaning at 90 degree angles. Cowboys staying on, cowboys falling off, cowboys getting their privates trounced. And a very entertaining rodeo clown that sang and danced to 80's music. All of the pictures are here, but I think this one sums it all up:

BOING!!!

Bull's got hops.

Calvin and I are going to Oregon in a few weeks for the Oregon Brewer's Festival. I also intend on visiting Powells, and Moonstruck. We're staying in downtown Portland and will be there for four days. Are there any readers out there that are native to the area, or have been there, that want to recommend a place to go or a sight to see? Send an e-mail or leave a comment, thanks!

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Sunday, June 24, 2007

There and back again.

(This isn't the first entry on which I've used this title.)

So, I'm back! For those of you who want the short version, then I'll just say that everything went well and I should hear back from them with a yea or nay by the second week of July.

For those of you who want the slightly longer version, with pictures, here you go.

I flew out of Arizona at 6:30 a.m. on Thursday morning. It's a three-hour leg to Chicago, then a two-hour leg to Maine. On the first leg, I sat next to a lady that was laughing HYSTERICALLY, way out loud, over the book she was reading. On the second leg, I sat next to a little nine-year-old boy who was travelling by himself to a lacrosse camp in Maine. On the layover in Chicago in between, I sat at the Fox Sports Bar and had myself a beer and a crab cake. During both entire legs of the flight I studied my brains out, going over all of the Factiva information that I printed out about this company, its parent entity, and the industry. I took copious notes. Very copious. Also, I like to say "copious".

I landed in Maine just before 5:00 p.m., grabbed my rental car and swung by the hotel just long enough to shower and change. My hotel was right next to the airport, but could have been in the middle of the wilderness, there was so much greenery around. Plus, there's like three flights a day out of Portland (I exaggerate, but it's no O'Hare), so I could leave my window open all night long and not be disturbed by 737's flying overhead. Here is the view from my hotel window:

The view from my hotel window.


I then departed again, and followed the directions from the hotel to the company I would be interviewing with the next day. That discovered (after only a slight mix up and turn-around), I high-tailed it to the nearest Amato's for Mecca Moment #2 of 2007 (see here for Mecca Moment #1).

Mecca achieved, again.


Then, not wanting to just take my sandwich back to my hotel room to eat, I decided to explore "down the road a piece" and see if I could find a place to sit by the ocean. Well, down the road a piece took me to Prouts Neck. I gawked at the OH MY GOD houses, then pulled into Ferris Beach, took off my flip flops, grabbed my camera, cell phone, and crack (italian and Humpty Dumpty "All Dressed" potato chips), and walked down to the sandy beach. I sat a few feet from the surf, scarfed my food, and called Calvin to describe to him where I was and what I was doing (and how it was totally surreal that I was back in Maine again, but without him this time).

Despite the fact that I was missing Calvin, I was HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY to be there at that moment in time. I can't even begin to describe it, but I think the other patrons of the beach were wondering why I had a constant and wacky grin on my face.

I walked up and down the beach for an hour or so, taking pictures and sucking in the wonderfully cool salt air (it was 116 in Phoenix that day, 68 in Maine at dusk, and I was trying very womanfully to NOT rub it in with Calvin).

Sea Grass at Prouts Neck

Prouts Neck Maine

Prouts Neck Maine

More sea grass and beach, Prouts Neck

Some guys fishing off of Prouts Neck. Notice how they're up to their waists so close to shore.

Prouts Neck at dusk

Prouts Neck

obligatory feet in sand shot


I REALLY didn't want to pull myself away from the beach, but I knew I had a couple of hours more study time to put in before my interview in the morning. So I meandered back to the hotel, got into my jammies, put some TV on in the background, ironed my suit, and wrote notes until my hand cramped. Then I called Calvin and went over the information I'd found and the questions that I'd listed to ask, just to make sure I didn't sound like a dumbass.

The alarm went off at 7:00 the next morning, and I got ready to go, had two cups of coffee, drove to the business, and had about a half-hour to spare before my 9:00 appointment. So I sat and fretted and listened to the radio until about ten 'til. I signed myself in and got a stinkin' badge, then cooled my heels for another few minutes before the administrator came to get me.

She sat me down in a conference room and had me perform a timed logic test. The type were there are a series of letters and/or numbers that form a pattern that may or may not be obvious, and I have to produce what the next letter or number of the pattern would be. For instance, if "aabbcc" was the pattern provided, the next letter would be "d". Believe me, they started out that simple but didn't stay that way for long. After a while I was scratching my head and muttering, "What the fuck?" I was relieved when the administrator reappeared to say my time was up.

At 10:00 I met with the man that would be my boss. We ran through my resume and I described to him my work history. He described what the position would entail and a bit about the company, and at half past the hour he was wrapped up with his questions, and asked me if I had any of my own.

Heh. So! I opened up my portfolio, set aside the stack of papers I'd researched, flipped through my PAGES of notes, and asked him a WHOLE BUNCH of questions. I kept him going on those for another half an hour. I think a couple of times he was surprised at what I knew and what I'd gleaned about the company from the reading that I did.

At 11:00 I met with one of the VP's of the company, and right off the bat he told me the first gent would be the one to make the decision, and his role was just to see if I would be a good fit, personality-wise, for the company. He said he could see that I was obviously "well qualified", so I was chuffed at that. We really just chit-chatted about the group, the person who'd previously held the role that I was interviewing for, his own tenure of over 25 years, family stuff, AcronymCo's industry versus the one they are in, and just basically tangented a lot. He asked me why I wanted to move back to Maine, and totally understood when I described to him how I just wanted to come home again.

At noon the first gent picked me up in front of the lobby, and we met two other folks from the company for lunch. They talked a lot about common acquaintances and common experiences, so I just basically nodded and smiled a lot. Then the gent and I went to take a tour of one of their facilities and inspect a project that was going on there. Finally at about 2:30 in the afternoon he dropped me back off at the lobby, and I was finally done.

I went back to the hotel and got out of my suit (and pantyhose, ugh), and called Calvin to tell him how it went. Then I called my sister and left her a message letting her know I was in town, and called my uncle's house to talk to his girlfriend (he was out of town).

I showered and dressed in jeans (thank GOD), and drove over by the mall to kill some time. I browsed through Borders Books and Music, and called my cousin to see if she and her husband wanted to get together with me that evening. We agreed to meet at LL Bean in Freeport at 9:00 that night, so I grabbed a quick beer at Uno's and went back to the hotel for a nap.

I got up at about 5:45 and was away again by 6:00. My plan was just to meander my way up to Freeport from Portland, taking the back roads and maybe stopping at one or two beaches along the way. Driving the roads in Maine is just so beautiful, even when you're not going anywhere in particular. It's wonderfully enjoyable to poke around the curvy, twisty roads, looking at all of the trees and beautiful farms and houses, with glimpses of the ocean beyond the foliage.

I got lost on purpose. I'm one of those people who HAS to know where a road leads. So I'd find a likely turn, wander down that road until another one caught my fancy, then steer down that one. I actually talked to myself, "My lordy, I am so lost. I don't even know what town I'm in anymore. Hey, I wonder where this road goes? It's got to come out somewhere. It's fun being lost..."

"La la la."

When I purposefully tried to get myself back to where I needed to be, I ended up taking a road that dumped me right in the middle of Freeport directly across the street from LL Bean. I am that good, people.

It was barely after 7:00 when I arrived at "Bean's", so I spent a leisurely hour shopping for clothes. I got myself a pair of light, white cotton pants, a baby blue camisole, a slightly darker blue knit button-up sweater, and a pair of Bean's signature slides. It was durn chilly by the time I was done, so I put the sweater on immediately, and wandered around talking with Calvin on the cell and looking for a way to kill another hour before my cousin and her husband showed up.

I went to Jameson Tavern and had a beer while enjoying the live guitarist, and left again at 8:30 to stroll back towards Beans. Calvin kept me company on the phone until they arrived.

My cousin and I used to spend a lot of time together when we were children. She is the only daughter of my mother's oldest brother. We spent entire summers together, a few weeks at her house, a few weeks at my house with Grandma, every holiday, and many weekends. She's a little over three years younger than me - we played hard, fought harder, then would catch each other's eye in the middle of a knock-down-drag-out wrestling match, and laugh hysterically.

Since we've grown up, and of course since I moved away from Maine, we've hardly seen one another at all. So I was very excited and really appreciated that they'd take the 45 minute drive, when they had to work the next morning, to come down to Freeport from where they live in Augusta, just to have dinner with little ol' me.

We went back to Jamesons and took a table in the restaurant side. We gabbed AND gabbed AND gabbed, about absolutely everything, trying to pack years of catching up into a couple of hours. My cousin and I are scarily alike, a fact that her husband commented on several times.

We paused to take a breath and look around, and realized it was almost 11:00 and we were the only ones left in the place. Which closed at 10:00.

Oops.

We went outside and sat at the little bistro tables they had set up on the front porch of the restaurant (a house built in 1791 and renovated), and talked for ANOTHER hour. We finally wrapped it up a little after midnight, since they had to work in the morning.

I took one more beeline through LL Bean to use their bathroom before getting in the car to drive back to Portland. They're open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year, even Christmas. You'd be surprised how many people were there shopping at 12:15 on a Friday night/Saturday morning.

I forgot how dark it gets in Maine at night. There aren't many street lights around, so I practiced my high beam skills. Hit the high beams, watch for cars coming toward you going in the other direction, hit the low beams, wait for them to pass by, hit the high beams, watch for cars... hit the low beams... wait for them to pass... hit the high beams...

I got back to the hotel at a little after 1:00, called Calvin to let him know I was safe, and hit the sack.

I slept in until 9:00 the next morning. My flight didn't leave until 1:30, so I took my time getting ready and packing. I had breakfast in the hotel restaurant while reading a book, and checked in at the airport at 11:30.

During the leg from Portland to Chicago I got to have a row of seats to myself. But the guy behind me was such an obnoxious conversationalist that I put my iPod on in self-defense. I mean, he was going on and ON about how he would only hang out with people with "old money", never with "new money". WHAT ever.

Chicago O'Hare was an absolute ZOO. My gate information wasn't on the board when I arrived, so I checked in with customer service, then sat at the bar at Chili's for a beer and southwestern egg rolls. It turned out that my flight, that was originally supposed to leave at 5:10, didn't actually get off the ground until nearly 7:00. If I had known I was going to be that delayed, I would have called Heather and asked her to hang out with me. I paced, I read, I got Starbucks, I pee'd about fifty times, I read some more. Then when I finally boarded the plane, I got seated next to this guy that smelled of cigarettes and bad breath, and he wouldn't stop getting into my personal bubble space. He annoyed the hell out of the other person in our row, the flight attendant (he pushed the call button, like, ten times to ask her why the fasten seatbelt sign was on... EVERY TIME it came on), and even the people in the row across from us. And he was in the MIDDLE seat, so you know that he had to lean across the other lady (I was in the window seat) to annoy the others.

Feh. By the time we landed in Phoenix I couldn't get off that plane fast enough. I called Calvin, who was circling the area, when I got my luggage, and he pulled up in front so I could just hop in and go. We stopped at home long enough for me to change and freshen up, and then got dinner at the Elephant Bar.

So there you go. A whirlwind, 6000-mile round trip from (almost) coast to coast, in about 60 hours. Peppered with good food, good conversation, a nerve-wracking interview process, and many many calls home.

I'll let you guys know as soon as I hear anything about the job. Thanks again for all of your well-wishing and support!

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Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Leaving on a jet plane

A quote from my entry from May 18th

"I just sat and breathed for a long, long time. It felt so good to be there, and when it came time to leave I kept stopping and looking around to try to infuse my spirit and mind with the peace I felt there. The whole trip was filled with moments like this, as I tried to take away as much of Maine as I could, not knowing the next time I would be able to be there again."

Okay, so apparently "next time" is June 21st, 2007. If you had told me then that I'd be back in Maine barely a month later, I'd have accused you of hitting the peace pipe.

I am very excited about my trip, and very nervous about my interview. I have hit Factiva and printed out a bunch of information about this company and the industry in which it dwells, and I plan to study up on the flight so I can wow them with my "expertise". Heh.

Calvin and I went shopping last weekend and I bought a new suit for the occasion. I feel very swank in it.

Calvin and I are trying not to put the cart in front of the horse, here, but we've done a lot of "what if" discussions should a rapid departure from Arizona be imminent. And we've looked at houses on Realtor.com. We really like this one. Wish we were in the position to buy now, because when we ARE ready, this puppy will have been sold.

Such is our timing on this whole situation. We're not ready to move, but we're ready for a change. We're not ready to sell, but we want to buy.

Cart, horse, etc. I haven't even gotten the job yet, so all of this woolgathering and angst and "what ifs" may as yet be moot.

I'll post about how it all went on Saturday night or Sunday morning. In the meantime, cross your fingers for me!

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Friday, June 15, 2007

Thanks!

Hey you guys, thanks to all the folks who have been leaving me such nice comments and sending me such nice e-mails, wishing me well on my upcoming interview. I'm trying not to mind-frack (heh, been watching BSG) myself over this, but it's hard.

I'm torn. Almost exactly half of me wants them to make an offer I can accept, and almost exactly half of me hopes they don't make an offer. If I get the offer, Calvin and I will be plunged into a whirlwind of departure prep, up to and including getting the house ready for sale. We would have to live apart for an undetermined amount of time. BUT we would finally have a foothold in Maine, which is where I've wanted to be for, oh, 14 YEARS.

If they don't make an offer, Calvin and I are free to make a more controlled exit from Arizona. We can continue to pay down our debt, fix the house up in a more leisurely manner, and then job hunt when we're more prepared to make a move.

I applied to that job on a whim, not really figuring that anything would come of it. So I guess if something does come of it, it was "meant to be".

It's nerve wracking, though.

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Monday, June 11, 2007

Eeep!

The company in Maine that I did a phone interview with a couple of weeks ago just called me. They want to fly me out next week, put me up in a hotel with a rental car, pay for my meals, take me out to lunch and dinner, have me interview with their muckety mucks, meet the people that would be reporting to me should they decide to offer me the job, and take me on a tour of their properties.

I just dropped Calvin off at the airport - he's doing some training in Texas all this week and is back on Friday. MAN, he needs to land RIGHT NOW so I can talk to him about this.

Once again, the word of the day is, "Eeep".

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Thursday, May 31, 2007

Stalling

I have a tedious and time consuming task to complete at work, and I am stalling (briefly) by writing an entry.

Michael (and, we suspect, a friend) drank all of Calvin's beer and the rest of his whiskey last night after we went to bed. That is a foul of major proportions and the child shall be spoken to this evening.

I am tired of juggling around my laptop, my purse, and my lunch bag as I go to and from work. Therefore, I purchased this, in navy. I was going to purchase this, but it wouldn't fit my lunch bag. Mama's gotta eat.

I heart eBags.

My Assessment of Prior Learning evaluation came back, and the stuff I learned at AcronymCo equates to 12 credits toward my degree. I think I'm done now, with the exception of maybe one or two last classes. Woot!

Calvin is leaving on a business trip for a week, in mid-June (is there a less cumbersome way to write that sentence?). That is poopy. But! I can cook "weird" things for dinner and watch reruns of CSI and Grey's Anatomy till the cows come home.

I got Calvin a 6-month subscription to the Beer of the Month Club for Father's Day. If Michael drinks those, he's a dead man.

I also bought something for our upcoming (five year!) anniversary, which I am eager to see how it turned out. Once I am no longer in danger of spoiling the surprise (say, in a week when I get it, even though our anniversary isn't until the 29th but you all KNOW how I can't keep a present from the person it's intended for until the date it's intended for) I'll tell you all about it.

Don't people that whistle tunelessly bother the HELL out of you? Once again I am turning in desperation to my iPod. I HATE working in a cubicle. But! I heart Luther Vandross. And also the new Finger Eleven CD that I bought.

Marie says she is moving out in two weeks. While not unexpected, it still comes as a shock to contemplate the thought that our youngest child is grown up enough to be on her own. Any danger (hah!) of empty-nest syndrome is unfortunately effectively crushed by the reminder that Michael ain't going anywhere until we're, like, retired.

Marie and her boyfriend, typical of all young couples eager to be all grown up and play house, have purchased a puppy from the local shelter (quoth Marie, "Hey, better a puppy than a baby!"). A very cute and sweet little pit-bull mix, who very kindly shared her kennel cough with Gadget and Gypsy.

Sigh.

Okay, I have to get crap done. Sigh again.

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Wednesday, May 02, 2007

The most annoying and disgusting cube neighbor ever.

I have a cube neighbor who pretty much LIVES in his cubicle. He eats there, I'm pretty sure he sleeps there. He CLIPS HIS TOENAILS into his garbage can, and I know for a fact that they don't all make it in. He uses that canned air spray to dust off his desk, sending dust bunnies wafting over the wall and onto my desk. He gets phone calls on his cell phone constantly, from someone who either hangs up or has a bad connection. Seriously, I counted how many times he said, "Hello?" this last time before he gave up and hung up. Seventeen. SEVENTEEN times he said hello and then finally figured out that no one was there. He eats some sort of disgusting, toxic, fishy smelling dish for lunch nearly every day, and it completely fumigates the entire floor. I have actually gotten nauseous from smelling his lunch. He sneezes a lot and doesn't cover his mouth, and it's the juicy kind of sneeze. And then he blows his nose. Enthusiastically. Juicily. He's on teleconferences a lot and speaks incredibly loudly, as if he needs to make himself heard by his conference participants in Asia, WITHOUT the technological benefit of a telephone.

GAH, I can't stand this guy. I think I'll start a petition to get him evicted.

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Monday, April 23, 2007

Reading the signs for a bad day.

My day is NOT starting off well. I slept like crap last night because my back is killing me, and when the alarm went off the first thought that entered my mind was, "Oh, this is bullshit." So I got up to get situated on the couch with my laptop, and when I went to look for the ice pack in the freezer to help alleviate my back pain, it was gone. Which doesn't surprise me, since lately it seems like every time I go to look for something to end some sort of misery I'm in, it's been taken. Last week it was my allergy medication, a couple of weeks ago it was cookies, this morning it's the ice pack.

I really, REALLY can't wait until the occupancy of this household is decreased. It is one child in particular that is ALWAYS taking things, and I'm really sick of it. That's all I'm saying.

Every morning my boss meets with the folks from manufacturing and then sends an e-mail to the folks in my group with all of the help needed for the day. Invariably my name is always all over the thing. Because I'm special that way. Well, he did say during my review that he wants me to become the "go-to" person. Guess he got his wish... not exactly mine, though. There's nothing like a half-dozen or more "gotta have it NOW" things shot at you first thing in the morning to get your day started off right!

Then Calvin just called me, and the guy that was responsible for hiring him into his company just resigned. It doesn't mean that much will change for Calvin's job, but this was one of the "good guys" and things will just be a little more of the suck now that he's leaving. Which got us talking along the lines of what we want to do and how we want to make our lives happier, which THEN got us down the conversational thread of how much we don't like what we're doing with our lives right now.

AND the cat is about to get murdered because he's just PISSING ME OFF. If I don't feed him as soon as my feet hit the floor when I get up in the morning, he starts looking for things to that will get him in trouble. His hope is that since I'm up to chase him away from whatever badness he's doing (because yelling at him SO doesn't work), I'll just go ahead and feed him since I'm up already. And the fucker is right. I've had to yell at him (again, ineffectually) for jumping up at the water dragon, trying to paw a soda can down off of the half-wall, messing with the wiring behind the TV, scuffling around under the couch, and jumping up on the kitchen counter. The little asshole.

I've got an MRI scheduled for 11:30, then a girly-doctor appointment for 3:30. Since going to the doctors has now become my least favorite thing to do, this double-appointment day is not helping things.

Feh. It's just going to be a bad day. At 9:30, I can just tell.

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Thursday, March 29, 2007

Please, make the lambs stop screaming.

What a fucking day.

I'm covering for Jen, who is on vacation. It is all her fault that I'm having a fucked day.

Heh. Not really, but it makes me feel better to blame her.

Really, the stuff I'm covering is not hers yet, it belongs to another person who is leaving soon and for whom Jen will be taking over - who is also on vacation, as it happens. So really? It's all her fault.

There, now I made Jen feel better, too. Speaking ill of a person makes their ears burn... does typing ill of them make their fingers burn? Or no, to follow that analogy to its logical conclusion, it would have to be their eyes that burn. Thus I ponder.

I wonder what it is about covering for someone that makes everything go wrong at once the moment their Out Of Plant notice is up? I swear, at one point I was e-mailing, talking on the phone, and conducting two separate IM conversations, all about different things that were going wrong at the same time. I'm not even kidding.

I would speak more about what makes work so fucked, but I'm trying to avoid getting dooced. (And yes, I searched Wikipedia to see if someone had written a definition of my website. Alas, nothing. I am, I admit, not as interesting as Heather and do not deserve to impact cultural slang.)

But, the salad I'm eating for lunch is making me happy. Spinach and lettuce and candied pecans and dried cranberries and diced chicken and diced melon and poppyseed dressing and cubed swiss cheese. Gastronomical goodness. Though something this calorie-laden should not be termed a salad. It's misleading.

And yet, I eat.

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Tuesday, February 06, 2007

work anecdote, work antidote

There's this guy that I work with at AcronymCo - I have worked with him in various roles (once he was my boss, even) for many of the eleven-and-a-half years that I've been employed here. And I know him. I know how he rolls. Which is why when he asked me last week to set up a meeting for this week to discuss a certain topic, I did so with alacrity. Knowing that I would need to contact him on the morning of the meeting to ask, "Is it still on?" Because he will have forgotten that he wanted us to meet, will have instead figured out another way to solve the problem or have had forty-seven other discussions with fifteen different people between the time that he asked me to schedule the meeting and the time that the meeting was to have occurred, during which discussions the problem would have a) been resolved; b) disappeared; c) evolved into something entirely different.

Lo, I e-mailed him this morning, "Are we still on?" To which he responded, "Huh?" It amused me, purely in the way that something I knew I could count on happening did, indeed, happen. That I know this particular gentlemen well enough to see into his future like a nickel fortune teller at a carnival. I like this guy, he's one of the good ones.

--------------------------------------------------------

Speaking of one of the good ones, I have been indulging in an e-mail conversation with Archibael this morning. I sent him the link I posted yesterday, to which he responded:

From: Archibael
Sent: Tuesday, February 06, 2007 9:13 AM
To: Laura
Subject: RE: speaking of Grease...


I don't know whether I'm impressed or disturbed. I'll go with the former... tentatively.

In other news... since the new Harry Potter is on the way July 21... any predictions?

Who will finally defeat Voldemort, and how?

What is Harry's destiny? Hermione's? Ron's?

Who will smack down Malfoy?

Is Dumbledore really dead?

Other predictions?

From: Laura
Sent: Tuesday, February 06, 2007 9:24 AM
To: Archibael
Subject: RE: speaking of Grease...


Harry will defeat Voldemort, though he may or may not die in the process. There was something in the prophesy that said that they could not suffer one another to live. Really, I think that Voldemort will just be diminished to the point where he really isn’t “alive”, but not able to come back again like he did in Goblet of Fire.

Harry’s not going to have a storybook ending. He may go in the way of Dumbledore, where he’s gone for all intents and purposes, but not “really” gone. Hermione and Ron will play a major role in the final battle – I see one of them seriously and permanently injured, probably saved by Harry who sacrifices himself for them. I just don’t see Harry going on to be an Aurora or a teacher or anything.

Malfoy will be smacked down by Snape, who will reveal himself as a “good guy”, though not in the traditional sense (hinted at by his own actions and Dumbledore’s continued belief in him in the Half Blood Prince). Malfoy will not die, but will live to be dismayed by his evil-doing.

Dumbledore is dead in the traditional sense, but there is something to that curtained portal that was present in Order of the Phoenix through which Sirius Black fell. Plus, of course, Dumbledore will show up in a portrait in the headmaster’s rooms, just like all of the rest of the headmasters before him. Fawkes is in there somewhere, too. The mystical relationship between Fawkes and Dumbledore will become apparent.

I have pre-ordered the book and I predict that I will have it read completely before 24 hours have passed with it in my possession.

From: Archibael
Sent: Tuesday, February 06, 2007 9:31 AM
To: Laura
Subject: RE: speaking of Grease...


Nah, Neville will defeat Dumbledore, using herbology.

Harry will become the new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher, Hermione eventually headmaster (she is, after all, the greatest witch of her age, as was Dumbledore the greatest Wizard). Ron will either become a professional Quidditch player or the Minister of Magic-- or maybe the latter will be his dad.

Malfoy will get smacked down by Dudley Dursley.

Dumbledore is dead, but he's on so many Chocolate Frog cards he'll be the ultimate spy since his portrait's essentially everywhere.

But where is the final piece of Voldy's soul? He had seven: one went away when he got "killed" the first time, another when Harry stabbed the book, and a third when Dumbledore destroyed the ring. That leaves three more in the other artifacts of the Founders, and one more unaccounted for. I think it's in Nagini.

From: Laura
Sent: Tuesday, February 06, 2007 9:42 AM
To: Archibael
Subject: RE: speaking of Grease...


You mean Neville will defeat Voldemort?

The endings you have for Harry/Hermy/Ron are nice and certainly I’d like to see that happen, but it’s too storybook ending and would not jive with the increasing darkness of the books.

Dudders! I’ll root for Dudders! Hm. That is a good thought, though… Harry’s not supposed to go back “home” after Half Blood Prince (or maybe the book said he would only briefly). I wonder what role the “family” is going to play?

Now, that Chocolate Frog card theory is an excellent one. I wonder, though, if any of the Deatheaters indulge in chocolate frogs?

They found one of the artifacts at the end of HBP, and I think that one is contained within Harry himself, which is why he prolly won’t live. (I forget, who’s Nagini?)

From: Archibael
Sent: Tuesday, February 06, 2007 9:49 AM
To: Laura
Subject: RE: speaking of Grease...


Yep. They've broadcast that one since book three, and underlined it in book 5 ("the one born in April" could have been either Harry or Neville). It's possible it's a red herring, but I don't believe so. Voldemort's torture of Neville's parents "marked" him as sure as Harry wears the lightning scar.

Well, Harry will be the Defense Against the Dark Arts instructor, at least. They've set him up for it by slowly eroding away all the careers which would make sense for him. The only thing left is Quidditch, but I think he'll be injured in the final conflict and won't be able to play. Ron and Hermione may be otherwise, but my vote on Harry's future I'm sticking with!

No, they didn't find anything at the end of HBP: Dumbledore died in vain, which was what made it so sad. They found a fake with a note from some guy who was playing a prank on Voldy. So there's still four out there, three of which they at least know about. Nagini is Voldy's pet snake. The other possibility is Harry, that's not bad... but I don't think, when it comes to it, Rowling will kill the boy off. Everyone else is headed for corpsedom, especially Percy (and good riddance!).

From: Laura
Sent: Tuesday, February 06, 2007 9:57 AM
To: Archibael
Subject: RE: speaking of Grease...


You have got a PSYCHO memory for details, man.

Oh, I agree that Neville will have a role to play in the final showdown, I just don’t think it’ll be him that brings about Voldemort’s demise.

You are permitted your own theories wrt Harry and his future. I will choose to stick with the thought that he will go the way of myths and heroes and legends. Ron and Hermione’s future fame will be based on the fact that they “knew” Harry Potter. But you’re probably right, Hermy will be Headmistress someday.

I think I’ll have to go back and re-read Half Blood Prince before the next book arrives. The details are fuzzy. Did you just read it or something? Or, no, the aforementioned crazy memory…

OH, I HOPE PERCY BITES IT!!!!!!! But when you say “everyone else is headed for corpsedom”, who do you mean? The rest of Ron’s brothers and Ginny? And Fleur, and Mr. and Mrs. Weasley? Cuz that would be poopy.

From: Archibael
Sent: Tuesday, February 06, 2007 10:01 AM
To: Laura
Subject: RE: speaking of Grease...


I dunno about Ginny. Mean authordom would dictate she must die, but Harry deserves some happiness.

No, I just have a good memory for details.

I think some of the Weasleys will live, but I bet Fred or George die. Possibly both. Fleur... is questionable. I would not be sad. Mrs. Weasley might die, since her greatest fear is that her kids and husband will die, and authors are irons.

I'm just rereading books 5 and 6 now in anticipation. And to stay ahead of Talia, who burned through book 3 in three days. I swear, when book 7 comes out it's going to be a fight between me, (wife), and (oldest daughter) who gets to read it first.

From: Laura
Sent: Tuesday, February 06, 2007 10:06 AM
To: Archibael
Subject: RE: speaking of Grease...


If it comes down to fisticuffs, you can have my copy after I read it. Like I said, I’ll be done with it quick. What is the 21st, anyway (besides the day after my birthday)? A Saturday? Oh heck yeah, I’ll have it read by Sunday. You can call me if fighting breaks out.

I’m putting this whole conversation on my website, just so’s ya know.

Labels:

Thursday, February 01, 2007

The power you're supplyin', it's electrifyin'.

Randomly with all the randomness:

A surefire way to improve one's mood at work is to listen to the Grease! Soundtrack.

Sometimes I put my iPod on at work out of sheer self-defense. Kitty-corner in one direction is a cube neighbor who has the MOST ANNOYING AND LOUDEST VOICE EVER. Kitty-corner in the other direction is a cube neighbor whose cell phone is CONSTANTLY ringing, and she's never there to answer it. And it's got a very annoying ring tone.

Song change! "Oh let the sun beat down upon my face..."

I have a lighthouse-themed calendar on my cubicle wall. It makes me happy. All lighthouses are automated now, but I really wish they were still manned. Calvin and I would make excellent lighthouse keepers.

If I say that I don't like how a movie ended, it's because the wrong person died, or the guy didn't get the girl, or the horse/dog/cat/monkey bit it. Case in point: City of Angels = WORST MOVIE EVER, GODDAMMIT. Flyboys = the ending wasn't completely awful, but didn't make me particularly happy either. 8 Below = I won't even watch it.

Song change! "I need direction to perfection, no no no no help me out..."

My idea of a day perfectly spent is to wake up in the morning with Calvin, get ourselves together and go get some breakfast (iHop crepes!). Then come back home, lock ourselves in the bedroom, indulge in some playtime, and take a nap. Then wake up, run to BevMo to stock up the fridge in the bedroom, lock ourselves in again for some more playtime, then lay around nekkid talking and swigging. Raid the kitchen (well, put some robes on first) for some munchies, pile back into the bedroom, snuggle and watch bad TV, playtime, nap. Alone. Uninterrupted.

The bad thing about noise-cancelling headphones is that one's boss can enter one's cubicle unheard while one is indulging in a sanity-keeping blogger post.

Our children are very bad at keeping up on their chores. Well, chore, singular. They're supposed to switch off on the upkeep of the kitchen (dishes, trash, etc.). Sometimes it'll get done five days in a row, other times it'll sit for three days, get done, sit for two more days... grr. It's the ONLY thing we ask them to do around the house. Grr again. I kvetch because I had to wash out my travel mug for the third morning in a row, this morning.

Song change! "...you're so exotic show me where you're comin' from..."

Song change! "Sheep go to heaven, goats go to hell."

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Sunday, January 07, 2007

Converting all your sounds of woe into hey nonny nonny

Sigh.

527 e-mails were awaiting my return to work. It's a good thing I logged in ahead of time tonight to do some spam weeding. Still, how depressing.

Labels:

Monday, November 27, 2006

Bliss.

I just realized that I'm on vacation from December 22nd through January 7th and don't go back to work until the 8th. That's 17 straight days off. AND, coincidentally, I have 17 more working days until vacation.

Tenure is such a good thing.

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