70% Bill Richardson
68% Chris Dodd
66% John Edwards
66% Hillary Clinton
63% Barack Obama
56% Mike Gravel
55% Joe Biden
52% Tom Tancredo
49% Rudy Giuliani
48% Dennis Kucinich
45% John McCain
43% Mitt Romney
41% Mike Huckabee
40% Fred Thompson
32% Ron Paul

2008 Presidential Candidate Matching Quiz

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Posted by Laura at 11:21 AM | Permalink | Comments

Which sci-fi crew would you best fit in with? (pics) created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Serenity (Firefly) You like to live your own way and don't enjoy when anyone but a friend tries to tell you should do different. Now if only the Reavers would quit trying to skin you. Serenity (Firefly) 100% Heart of Gold (Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy) 100% Nebuchadnezzar (The Matrix) 81% Millennium Falcon (Star Wars) 81% SG-1 (Stargate) 75% Galactica (Battlestar: Galactica) 75% Moya (Farscape) 75% Babylon 5 (Babylon 5) 69% Bebop (Cowboy Bebop) 69% Deep Space Nine (Star Trek) 69% FBI's X-Files Division (The X-Files) 56% Andromeda Ascendant (Andromeda) 44% Enterprise D (Star Trek) 19%

Labels: blogthings

Posted by Laura at 10:20 AM | Permalink | Comments

Do you have any weird things in your room?: Ummm... Calvin's pRon collection?

If you could have any pet what would you have?: A horse.

Best thing to do on a rainy day?: Eat a grilled cheese sandwich and tomato soup.

How many movies do you own?: Around 50?

Best vacation you've ever gone on?: It's a tie between our trip to Hawaii and our last trip to Maine.

Coolest person you've ever met?: Calvin's Grandparents.

Ever taken a trip on a bus?: When my Grandmother took me and my cousin and aunt to Florida, we rode a Greyhound from Kissemme to Busch Gardens. It sucked.

Wildest thing you've done while drunk?: Danced on stage in my skirt and bra. Any other wild things I can't mention here.

Best time you've ever had at a playground?: Umm? Playing kissing tag in fifth grade?

Ever almost get hit by a train?: Nope.

Has anyone ever sent you flowers, why?: My friend Kim from Maine send me flowers for my last birthday. Calvin's gotten them for me a couple of times, too.

Ever have an imaginary friend?: Yes, Joshua. What do you mean you can't see him, he's sitting right next to me!

Best color of eyes?: Happy.

Ever electrocute yourself?: When I was little we (me and the other girls at the stables) would do this thing with the electric fence containing the horses (hooked up to a car battery), where a few of us would hold hands and the girl on one end would grab the fence and the girl on the other end would feel the shock. Other than that, I have touched light switches and sockets with wet hands, which wasn't terribly bright of me. Well, and neither was the first thing.

Most cans of pop you've ever drank in a day?: Six.

How many phones do you own?: Landlines: one in the kitchen, one in the bedroom. Cell phone: one.

Do you collect anything cool?: Shot glasses and post cards. How cool is that?

How often do you clean your room?: Weekly.

Best thing to watch late at night?: Reruns of CSI.

What friend do you have the most fun with?: I have the most fun with the friend that I'm with at the time. ALL of my friends are fun.

Ever caused or been involved in a car crash?: I caused a fender bender once - I backed into a car while I was in the truck. Just didn't see them through the Avalanche's STELLAR back window. Not a scratch on the truck, but their trunk was bent all to hell.

Worst thing someone's ever done to you?: They all involved my ex.

Are you creative?: Occasionally.

Do you enjoy family gatherings?: Depends on whose family.

Do you let other people drive your car?: We have been known to let Marie and Michael borrow the truck, but VERY SELDOMLY.

What's something you own that's of great value to you but no one else?: My "Brad's Bunch" marble paper weight, and the ceramic bear my mother made for me when I was born.

Favorite class you took in high school?: Probably one of my English classes. I LOVED the "World Culture and the Arts" class that I took in college, though.

Best sleep over you've been to?: The life-long one I'm on with Calvin. Awww...

Favorite family member to hang out with?: Other than Calvin? Oh, geez, THIS question is gonna start a fight...

Something you like to eat that everyone else thinks is gross?: If by "everyone else" you mean my immediate family, anything that remotely resembles a vegetable.

Ever lost something important?: Not that I know of.

Do you look good in hats?: Absolutely not, to my everlasting disappointment.

How often do you do laundry?: Every weekend. But it only gets washed and dried, not folded/hung up/put away. That's more like... monthly.

Do you like driving places at night?: Yes, one of the ways I cool off my temper or fend off a bad mood is to go for a drive at night with a good (usually loud) CD.

Best present you ever gave someone?: I don't know. You'd have to ask everyone I've ever given a present to. What a dumb question.

Best gift you ever received?: My first horse, compliments of my Grandma.

Have anything on your computer you wouldn't want people to see?: Neeeeeext question...

Do you like playing video games?: No, I never really got into them.

Ever been on a sports team?: Soccer, briefly, in seventh grade. Also, several equine teams.

Best way to waste a day?: I'd say having sex, except that's not a waste. Reading? Napping? Watching reruns of CSI?

Where do you keep your bath towel?: On my person at all times, like a good little Hitchhiker.

Ever worn a wig?: No.

What do you think of tongue piercing?: I wouldn't do it myself. I mean, how bad does it suck to BITE your tongue?

Do you own any rechargeable batteries?: Yes, because we have digital cameras.

Ever get a rope burn?: Yes, and they are THE SUCK.

Favorite place to get food from?: Gillespie's Farm in Maine.

Ever thought you were going to marry someone?: Imagine my surprise when I actually did!

What age did you have the most fun?: 20's

Longest phone conversation you've ever had?: Probably with my friends when I was a teenager.

Ever been in a hotel with your best friend?: Duh.

Ever been hunting?: No, but I have fished.

Would you ever disown your family?: If they deserved it, yes.

Is TV the best thing ever?: No, that would be the Internet.

Ever ate cake out of a cup?: Como?

Do you own beads or any craft supplies?: BWAAAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA.

Ever know anyone who house burned down?: My sister burned down my mother's house.

Best Christmas ever?: Probably one from my childhood, or the first one I had with Calvin and the kids.

Favorite thing to sleep in?: Skin.

Ever slept outside?: Yes. Camping and in the hammock at my Grandmother's house.

What's the worst day of your life?: The day my Grandma died.

Are you having a good day today?: Sure.

Do you think the other members of your family are happy?: As much as I am, I guess.

When the last time you went to the doctors?: A few weeks ago.

Ever think you were going to die?: YES.

Are you tired right now?: Not really.

Ever have a pet die?: I'm afraid so.

What did you dream last night? I don't remember all the details, but it was very James Bond-ish. There was running from people and hiding from people and kicking people's asses and discovering traitors amongst friends. I have very well developed plotlines in my dreams.

Labels: blogthings

Posted by Laura at 11:27 AM | Permalink | Comments

YOUR GUY SIDE:
[x] You like hoodies.
[x] You like jeans.
[ ] Dogs are better than cats.
[ ] It's hilarious when people get hurt. ((Well, sometimes)
[x] You've played with/against boys on a team.
[x] Shopping is torture.
[ ] Sad movies suck.
[ ] You own/ed an X-Box.
[x] Played with HotWheels cars as a kid.
[ ] At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
[x] You own/ed a DS, PS2 or Sega.
[ ] You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers.
[x] You watch sports on TV.
[x] Gory movies are cool.
[ ] You go to your dad for advice.
[ ] You own like a trillion baseball caps.
[ ] You like going to high school football games.
[ ] You used to/do collect football cards.
[ ] Baggy pants are cool to wear.
[ ] It's kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
[x] Green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colors.
[x] You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
[x] Sports are fun.
[x] Talk with food in your mouth.
[x] Sleep with your socks on at night.(when it's cold)
TOTAL: 13

YOUR GIRL SIDE:
[ ] You wear lip gloss/stick.
[ ] You love to shop.
[x] You wear eyeliner.
[x] You wear the color pink.
[ ] Go to your mom for advice.
[x] You consider cheerleading a sport.(have you seen some of the things those kids can do?!?)
[ ] You hate wearing the color black.
[ ] You like hanging out at the mall.
[x] You like getting manicures and/or pedicures.
[ ] You like wearing jewelry.
[ ] Skirts are a big part of your wardrobe.
[ ] Shopping is one of your favorite hobbies.
[ ] You don't like the Star Wars movies.
[x] you were in gymnastics/dance.
[ ] It takes you around/more one hour to shower, get dressed, and make-up.
[x] You smile a lot more than you should.
[x] You have more than 10 pairs of shoes.
[x] You care about what you look like.
[ ] You like wearing dresses when you can.
[x] You like wearing body spray/perfume/cologne.
[x] You love the movies.
[x] Used to play with dolls as little kid.
[ ] Like putting make-up on someone else for the joy/joke of it.
[ ] Like being the star of every thing.
Total: 11

Oh dear. All I can say is (1) I'm a country girl; and (b) I'm married to Calvin. The first turned me into a tomboy, the second made me appreciate sports.

Labels: blogthings

Posted by Laura at 10:17 PM | Permalink | Comments

You Are a Smart American

You know a lot about US history, and you're opinions are probably well informed. Congratulations on bucking stereotypes. Now go show some foreigners how smart Americans can be.

Labels: blogthings

Posted by Laura at 8:58 AM | Permalink | Comments

you chose CX - your Enneagram type is TWO (aka "The Charmer").

"I must help others"

Helpers are warm, concerned, nurturing, and sensitive to other people's needs.

How to Get Along with Me

• Tell me that you appreciate me. Be specific.
  
• Share fun times with me.
  
• Take an interest in my problems, though I will probably try to focus on yours.
  
• Let me know that I am important and special to you.
  
• Be gentle if you decide to criticize me.

In Intimate Relationships



• Reassure me that I am interesting to you.
  
• Reassure me often that you love me.
  
• Tell me I'm attractive and that you're glad to be seen with me.

What I Like About Being a TWO

• being able to relate easily to people and to make friends
  
• knowing what people need and being able to make their lives better
  
• being generous, caring, and warm
  
• being sensitive to and perceptive about others' feelings
  
• being enthusiastic and fun-loving, and having a good sense of humor

What's Hard About Being a TWO

• not being able to say no
  
• having low self-esteem
  
• feeling drained from overdoing for others
  
• not doing things I really like to do for myself for fear of being selfish
  
• criticizing myself for not feeling as loving as I think I should
  
• being upset that others don't tune in to me as much as I tume in to them
  
• working so hard to be tactful and considerate that I suppress my real feelings

TWOs as Children Often

• are very sensitive to disapproval and criticism
  
• try hard to please their parents by being helpful and understanding
  
• are outwardly compliant
  
• are popular or try to be popular with other children
  
• act coy, precocious, or dramatic in order to get attention
  
• are clowns and jokers (the more extroverted TWOs), or quiet and shy (the more introverted TWOs)

TWOs as Parents

• are good listeners, love their children unconditionally, and are warm and encouraging (or suffer guilt if they aren't)
  
• are often playful with their children
  
• wonder: "Am I doing it right?" "Am I giving enough?" "Have I caused irreparable damage?"
  
• can become fiercely protective

Renee Baron & Elizabeth Wagele

The Enneagram Made Easy
Discover the 9 Types of People
Harper SanFrancisco, 1994, 161 pages

Labels: blogthings

Posted by Laura at 11:44 AM | Permalink | Comments

Labels: blogthings

Posted by Laura at 11:15 AM | Permalink | Comments

Stolen from Heather's MySpace bulletin thingy... (I'm on my MySpace page about once a week and just about NEVER respond to bulletins there, but I'm not too lazy to cut and paste 'em here!):

25 sentences about you.

Finish the sentences:

1. I've come to realize that my ex: was wrong about every bad thing he ever said to or thought about me. I win!

2. People like me because: I'm good enough and smart enough.

3. I talk: with big words not because I'm trying to IMpress, but because I'm trying to EXpress.

4. I love: a rainy night. The song and the experience.

5. My best friends are : accepting and generous and sympathetic and tolerant and loyal and smart and funny and pretty and handsome and make me a better person.

(what happened to six, Heather?)

7. I lost : my childhood. But I gained my womanhood.

8. I hate it when : my hair makes me late for work.

9. Love is: the opportunity to become greater together than I ever would have been apart.

10. Marriage is: a study in patience, a practice in negotiation, a lesson in understanding, and a realization of happiness.

11. Somewhere, someone is thinking: whatever happened to my lunchbox?

12. I'll always be: trying to do better.

13. I have a crush on: Ozzy!

14. The last time I cried was: last Thursday when I wrote the entry about the bad anniversary.

15. My cell phone: is used for calling Heather while I'm in the grocery store.

16. When I wake up in the morning: I lay in bed for a while staring at the ceiling and thinking.

17. Before I go to sleep at night: I deal with Oz yowling his way into the bedroom with his "baby".

18. Right now I am thinking about: Calvin's side of the family.

19. Babies are: too far away when they live in Texas.

20. I get on myspace: about once a week to giggle at peoples' pictures, check up on the family, and say hi to my friends.

21. Today I: worked, cleaned the water dragon's vivarium, cleaned the beardie's tank, cleaned the kitchen, did the laundry, and dealt with some family drama.

22. Tonight I will: probably deal with some more family drama.

23. Tomorrow I will: work some more, go to the doctor's, cook, clean, and deal with life.

24. I really want: all the answers.

25. The person who is most likely to repost this: Jen, I bet.

Labels: blogthings

Posted by Laura at 7:14 PM | Permalink | Comments

Link: The Which Lolcat Are You? Test written by GumOtaku on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test

Labels: blogthings

Posted by Laura at 9:31 AM | Permalink | Comments

Avitable's answers are much more funny - and more dirty - than mine.

1. What's the last mistake you made? I cut things a little close with our finances this month due to not paying close enough attention.

2. Is the sun shining? Fuck yes. Too damned much, it's shining.

3. Can you successfully blow up and tie a balloon? The blowing (heh) isn't so much a problem, the tying always thwarts me.

4. Do you like text messaging? I am very anti-text messaging. For crying out loud, a phone is for making phone calls.

5. Are you having a good/bad hair day? I'm having an unopinionated hair day - pony tail, no product.

6. What was your last purchase? A movie ticket to "Live Free or Die Hard".

7. Are you wearing any make-up right now? None ay-tall. Combined with number five, I am one sessy bitch.

8. What are your plans for later? Watch more TV, surf more internet, listen to Calvin HUFF (he's bored), read, feed the lizards, feed the dogs, get the coffee ready for tomorrow, and go to bed.

9. What is your favorite DDR song? I had to Google this one... DDR I believe stands for "Dance Dance Revolution", which I have never played and so I have no favorite. I think the Dance, Bitches! mix would qualify... of which I would say "California Love" is my favorite.

10. Is there any drama within your life? Geez oh Pete, is there ever. Calvin and I want a total life change, my step son still hasn't moved out of the house, my step daughter is having living drama with her roommate, my sister still isn't speaking to me... we don't covet drama at all, it just seems to find us.

11. What is a song they need to stop playing on the radio? Hip hop is total bologna lately, I don't know why. I'm a fan of the format, but lately I haven't found any new songs that I want to listen to. "Great Escape" by Gwen Stefani (pop, not hip hop, but it qualifies for this question) is WAY overplayed right now.

12. Are you content with life right now? For the most part, I am easy to keep content. Calvin is the high-maintenance one. I do wish we could make significant progress toward our goals, though.

13. Does anyone like you? It's funny, I was just thinking about the friends I used to have last year that have since shunned me, for their own reasons. I'm a good person and a good friend, but for some reason there have been notable occasions in my life where a friend has just gone all, "Fuck it, I don't want to be friends with you anymore." Which is weird, because I would never dream of abandoning a friend, even if they were pissing me off. It just brings the REAL friends I have in my life to the forefront and makes me appreciate them all the more. (Heather, Jen, Ann Marie, Archibael, Dawn, my friend Kim in Maine, plus the on-line friends that I haven't met in "real life" yet... Amanda and Sherry and Robyn and Crystal and Jayne (who doesn't have a website anymore and I miss it!) and Dana and Morag and JenFu and fifty-seven other OLJ-ers whom I hope won't be insulted because I didn't mention them...)

14. What is your current obsession? Money, and the acquisition thereof.

15. Do you have your license? To drive? Yes. To do anything else that requires a license? No.

16. Ever been kissed under mistletoe? Yes, trite as that sounds.

17. Would you ever smile at a stranger? If I make eye contact, I always offer at least a polite smile.

18. Ever done a random act of kindness? I try to do a little something kindly random every day.

19. Do your toenails have nail polish on them? Not at the moment. I am in dire need of a pedicure. See # 5 and # 7 for the total picture.

20. When is the last time you wore eyeliner? A couple of weekends ago when Calvin and I went out for our anniversary. Usually I don't like to wear it because I end up rubbing my eyes and fucking it all up.

21. Last curse word you said was? See # 20.

22. Are your lips chapped? No, they are nice and soft and Calvin-kissable.

23. Are you currently jealous? Not at all.

24. Do you own an iPod? I am currently convinced that life without my iPod would not be a life worth living.

25. Did you have a dream last night? I dreamed, but I don't remember what it was.

26. Are you mad at anyone? My sister on general principles. The aforementioned friends that are shunning me (but only when I think about it). My stepson occasionally when he ignores his chores.

27. Who is the most random person you know? Okay, I have to leave Avitable's answer here: "Platypus with a side of potato nipples."

28. What's going on this weekend? More moving of our shit belongings into storage.

29. Done any spring cleaning lately? It's July.

30. Anything bothering you? Many things bother me, none of which I feel like expounding upon at the moment.

32. Did you wish for anything last night on 11:11? Heh, Marie got me started on this when she was really little. I was asleep last night at 11:11, though.

33. Do you drink coffee on a regular basis? Every blessed morning. And sometimes in the afternoon. Always with dessert at restaurants.

34. Do you wish you were someone else? No, I just wish to improve upon the me that I am right now.

35. What jewelry are you wearing? Just my wedding ring.

36. Ate any exotic food lately? We ate a lot of raw things in Maine... steak and tuna tartar. Nothing exotic about the steak and tuna noodles and spaghetti and burgers and meatloaf and chicken that have graced our menus lately.

38. Are you easily amused? My sense of humor is losing more and more sophistication the longer I hang out with Calvin.

39. Can you lick your elbow? No, I have Calvin to do that should the need arise.

40. Do you know this song, "we stay fly no lie you know this"? Um, no. But I do know all the words to C&C Music Factory's "Sweat".

41. What piercings do you have? Three in one ear, two in the other, and my navel. All of which I haven't actually worn anything in for quite some time, now.

42. Do you have a crush right now? I really like that cute kid from the Mac commercials. Justin Long.

43. What are your plans over the summer? To stay out of the heat as much as humanly possible. Also, we're going to Oregon next week.

44. How's life going for you? At the moment, tediously. Hence, this survey.

45. What is on your mind just this second? The movie "Casual Sex" is currently boggling my mind. It's devastating in its 80's-ness. I also wonder why I love every kind of seafood but I don't like oysters on the half-shell.

Labels: blogthings

Posted by Laura at 6:14 PM | Permalink | Comments

See previous installment here, which was a little over three years ago. And most things still apply. But I am a very complex woman, ergo you get to know two hundred things about me.

1. I like my eggs over medium. Just right for dipping triangles of toast into the yolk, without grossing myself out with undercooked egg.


2. I like Disney endings. Therefore, any book/TV show/movie/whathaveyou that doesn't have a happy ending, pisses me off.


3. I will not touch any bug, ever. Not to step on, not to slap, not to squish. When I feed the lizards their worms and whatnot, I use the feeding tongs.


4. I only get manicures and pedicures when I'm going on vacation.


5. I love maps. I love looking at them, plotting trips and routes, and putting little flags on them where I've visited. My office walls are lined with maps, which tells people (accurately) that I'd rather be anywhere but my office.


6. I have a very limited amount of patience for stupidity. The amount of time that elapses between my encounter with a stupid person, and my inevitable implosion, decreases with each passing year.


7. I HATE folding laundry. Second to that on the list of top household chores that I hate is cleaning out the vivarium.


8. As long as I have good music to listen to, I have an inexhaustible amount of patience when stuck in traffic.


9. When I was little I used to listen through walls using the old ear-to-glass method. You'd be surprised how well that works. I wouldn't have to resort to spying if my family hadn't kept so many damned secrets.


10. My sister found the notebook I used to scribble my spy-findings in (ala Harriett) between the mattresses of my bed years after I had moved away. She brings it up a lot, there were incriminating things about her in it.


11. I can whistle pretty darned well.


12. Once when I was in my early teens I made a recording of myself singing some Chicago (the band, not the musical) songs. It got into the wrong hands. That ranks as one of my most embarrassing moments.


13. The other most embarrassing moment was the first time I ever farted in front of Calvin. If I recall correctly, I think I cried.


14. As I get older, I regret with more frequency that I do not have a mother.


15. I have never liked Moxie, which in Maine is grounds for deportation.


16. Every time Calvin and I go through an automated car wash I'm tempted to suggest that we hop in the back seat and have sex.


17. I'm good at my job, but I don't particularly like it.


18. I believe in spankings. I do not believe in beatings.


19. The 2008 Presidential Elections will be the first in which I am a registered voter. However, I will still exercise my right not to vote if there are nothing but bozos on the ticket.


20. I would eat a lot healthier if I were single. But I eat a lot funner being married.


21. I totally resent exercise.


22. I have been known to read three entire books in a single day.


23. I ignore the entire world when a new book from one of my favorite authors comes out. Especially if I've been waiting for a long time. I'm looking at YOU, Jean M. Auel.


24. This go around, I'm having a harder time coming up with 100 things than I did last go around.


25. My self-image is probably a lot harsher than reality.


26. I am obsessed with this website.


27. I confess that Calvin and I have gone out and bought a featured booze after seeing it on Three Sheets. The last purchase made thusly was a bottle of Pappy's.


28. I will never understand nor condone the use of watermelon in any soup, hot or cold.


29. I will never understand nor condone the purchase and wearing of Crocs (the original traditional weird ones - they've expanded their product line and have some more acceptable options now).


30. I hate having my toes pulled on.


31. The last time I had to have an IV, I cried a little.


32. I can tolerate watching The Sound of Music, now that I am 22 years beyond performing as Brigitta.


33. If I didn't have my iPod with its noise cancelling headphones, I would have performed a homicide at work by now.


34. Every time I think of it, it still seems weird to me that Patrick Dempsey is from Maine.


35. Garlic salt has replaced all regular salt on my food. There are no circumstances that I have come across where regular salt should be used instead. Except for baking pies, cakes, and cookies, that is.


36. Grandma used to get mad at me for eating all of the sweet peas out of her garden before they ever had a chance to make it to the table.


37. I have always wanted to visit the Puget Sound in Washington.


38. Of all of the foreign countries I could visit, Europe is at the top of my list and Asia is at the bottom. I don't exactly know why that is. The funny thing is, given my job and the company that I work for, I am more likely to go to Asia than I am Europe.


39. I have never been in or near a tornado, but I have nightmares about them.


40. I like strawberries better than blueberries, but I'd rather have blueberry pie than strawberry pie.


41. My favorite kind of pie is coconut cream. NOT meringue.


42. To me, eating meringue is like eating fluffy plastic.


43. I hate the use of the phrase, "without further ado". I mean, READ that. It makes no sense.


44. Lilacs are my favorite flower and scent.


45. I kind of wish that werewolves and vampires were real.


46. If I could have a superpower, I would want the ability to fly. Sometimes I have flying dreams that are so vivid, that when I first wake up I could swear that I could retain the ability while conscious.


47. I'm disappointed that the Storyteller project never really got off the ground.


48. I haven't written a short story since this one. I need to tap into that hobby again.


49. I don't like watching baseball on TV, but I like going to a game. I could say it's because of the beer that I like to go to the ballpark, but I could drink beer at home while watching it on TV, so I don't know. I'm a complex person, I guess.


50. It might make me a bad person, but I have favorites among my pets. I claim the Fifth on that question with respect to my children.


51. I am pro-choice, but would not have an abortion myself.


52. I think someone should take a contract out on Paris Hilton. If it actually happens, well, I saw some kids running...


53. Most weekends I wake up at about 8:00. I can lay there staring up at the ceiling with my brain wandering around (nice visual, that) for over a hour before I finally lever myself out of bed.


54. No matter how hot the summers get (and it gets HOT here), I still want a steaming cup of coffee first thing in the morning. In fact, 'want' doesn't cover it. It's more of a necessity - for me, and everyone who may have to deal with me that day.


55. Some times I contemplate "coming out" on my journal and using my real name. Other times I am quite grateful that not much at all comes up when you Google my real name.


56. Yes, I HAVE vanity Googled. And so have you.


57. Something about car trips makes me need to pee frequently. But I can go all day sitting in my cubicle without having to go once.


58. I don't really like Clint Eastwood. Oh, as a person I'm sure he's a nice guy. I've just never cared for his movies.


59. I bought a guitar in December but I haven't played (with) it very much at all. I have plenty of opportunities to practice, I just... don't.


60. I'm not the only one who thinks that pizza is the universe's answer to the perfect all-in-one food. Meat, dairy, grains, veggies, it's all there.


61. Sometimes I forget to breathe. This is less related to the fact that I have asthma, and more related to the way that I deal with stress. I guess turning blue is part of my process.


62. I have very few friends from my childhood that I still keep in touch with.


63. My favorite color is blue and has been for my entire life.


64. I'm a little bit afraid of my motorcycle. Though it could be more the idiots that are on the roads around here that are scaring me more than my own (lack of) riding ability that is scaring me, I don't know.


65. I didn't plan where my life has ended up thus far. I hope that my lack of planning continues to be this successful.


66. I sleep with three pillows. One to lie on, one to snuggle with, and one to throw on the floor at some point during the night.


67. I used to have a bad recurring nightmare about featureless faces staring in at me through my windows at night, and as a result I can't leave the blinds open after dark.


68. Oz likes Calvin more than he likes me.


69. I have read the "Little House on the Prairie" series entirely through approximately seventeen times. My favorite book was "Farmer Boy".


70. I like Matt Damon infinitely more than Ben Affleck. It seems to me that Matt Damon becomes his characters, while Ben Affleck is just Ben Affleck playing some guy in a movie.


71. Spell check is not working on this entry for some reason, so it will probably be fraught with mistakes and I will be outted as illiterate.


72. A pretty boy is less attractive to me than one that can make me laugh.


73. I like to eat cold Chinese food right from the container with my fingers.


74. I use a file sharing program to download songs to see if I like the song/album/artist. If I do, I usually go out and buy their CD. Using this method, I have far less "listen once and then ignore forever" CD's in my collection.


75. The first time I ever met a black man I told him in complete innocence and earnestness that he had a nice tan. I was six and he was a friend of my sister's. They laughed their asses off while I tried to figure out what was so funny.


76. I am so entrenched in my morning routine that I sometimes stop in the middle of things and can't remember if I completed a step. Case in point, I once shampooed my hair twice because I couldn't remember after I put the conditioner in if I had shampooed first.


77. I have a gun and I know how to shoot it, but I couldn't hit the broad side of a barn if I was standing five feet in front of it.


78. I used to go for a long drive when I was upset or angry, doing a circuit of the freeway systems and blasting cathartic tunes. I haven't had to do that in a long time.


79. I DON'T FLOSS. Four out of five dentists lecture me every chance they get.


80. I can remove my bra without taking my shirt off. This magic trick is passed from female to female during the super secret First Bra Ritual.


81. I could never be a school teacher. I don't have the patience. I'm a really cool babysitter, though.


82. I get songs stuck in my mind for DAYS.


83. I hated Taco Bell for years. Now we eat it about once a week. My favorites are the chicken quesadilla and double decker taco supreme.


84. I'm starting to become a fan of Formula One racing.


85. I'm still not a fan of NASCAR.


86. Aimless whistlers are first on my list to take down.


87. Last month I saw Porky's (one AND two) for the first time ever. Calvin was horrified that I had somehow missed this pillar of cinematic genius. He went out and rented the movies the moment I admitted this gap in my cultural upbringing.


88. I used to LIVE for swimming when I was little. Now I can't remember the last time I went swimming. That probably has less to do with any distaste for the act, and more to do with how I look in a bathing suit.


89. I think text messaging is dumb. And not just because I am extraordinarily bad at it.


90. I would totally have sex with the guy that invented blue jeans.


91. I know every word of every song on WHAM!'s "Make It Big" album.


92. The first record (RECORD, as in vinyl) I ever bought was the "Footloose" album. Or was it Michael Jackson's "Thriller"? One of those.


93. When I was a teenager, my bedroom walls were papered with horse posters, and my locker was lined with posters of Johnny Depp and Richard Greco.


94. I have flip flops for every occasion.


95. I can't wear lipstick. It drives me nuts.


96. Some people's ring tones make me want to shove their cell phones... where the sun doesn't shine.


97. I probably inspire that feeling in others. My current ring tone is "Dancing Queen".


98. If I sat on my hands I wouldn't be able to talk.


99. My worst habit is interrupting people when they're speaking. That's mostly because if I don't speak the thought right as it comes to me, I'll forget what I wanted to say.


100. I'll probably try this exercise again in another three years. I'll still be blogging, you bet your bippy.

Labels: blogthings, journal, meme

Posted by Laura at 8:49 PM | Permalink | Comments

Yesterday I dropped Calvin off at the airport, went to Trader Joe's and stocked up on salads for my lunches and dinners for this week (I do NOT cook for myself if I don't have to - this behavior hearkens back to when I was single and eating plates of asparagus for dinner), got home, folded/hung up/otherwise put away five loads of clean laundry, got the call from the company in Maine for me to fly out and interview with them next week, freaked out a little bit, did some work-work, washed and dried the sheets and put them back on the bed, talked to Calvin when he landed in Texas, did some more work-work, dusted and de-cluttered the bedroom, talked to Calvin as he was driving from the airport to his hotel, cleaned the kitchen for an HOUR (even though that is MICHAEL'S JOB but I was sick of seeing the mess after three days of not getting done and apparently the "talk" that Calvin had with him last week did LOADS of good), talked to Calvin when he got to his hotel room, worked out, fed the dogs, fed the cat, fed the lizards, fed myself, talked to Calvin while he was at a restaurant eating his dinner, read off and on, got the coffee ready for the morning, packed my lunch for the next day, read some more, talked to Calvin before he went to bed, then went to bed myself at about 9:30.

When Calvin is away I tend to keep myself busy. Tonight I plan on giving the dogs a bath, moving Lucy to her own tank because Cheeto keeps picking on her, watching the next disc in season two of Battlestar Galactica, and probably reading some more.

As of yesterday, Marie is officially moved out. I say officially, even though she's been pretty much living with her boyfriend for a couple of months, because she removed all of her clothing, her stereo, and her snake. She and her boyfriend are sharing a house with another friend of theirs (they were staying at his mom's house before), about two minutes away from our house. She doesn't want me to come over and see their place until "everything is put away and set up and CLEAN". Heh. They went shopping for towels and linens and bedding yesterday. Heh again. I remember when that kind of stuff used to be sooooo coooool. Playing house is fun, in the beginning.

I haven't seen much of Michael since he got his motorcycle back up and running on Sunday night. I'm kind of annoyed at him right now, for the whole not-doing-the-kitchen thing, among other things. Calvin's talking-to should have had him stepping up and doing his chores and LOOKING for other things to do around the house, just to please us. I also researched and printed up a LOOOONG list of potential jobs that he could be applying to, since he doesn't make enough at his current job to enable him to move out, and he didn't seem inclined to do the research himself. To my knowledge, he hasn't followed up on any of those. Calvin told Michael that he had to be out by August 31st, and that we needed to see a plan from him on how he's going to be out by then. So far, not a peep of what he's done or what he's doing or what he's going to do. When he is around, he's either asleep or upstairs with his girlfriend. When he isn't around, he's either at work or hanging out elsewhere with his girlfriend.

So, I am frustrated. It got to the point a long time ago where I am just as civil to him as the situation warrants, but I don't go out of my way to talk or be nice or much of anything. My shoulders creep up to my ears and my neck ceases up when I hear him come home, and I pretty much just want to close myself in my bedroom and avoid dealing with him altogether. I feel guilty for feeling this way, until I remind myself that his behavior has eroded away my good regard of him until there is not much left but this feeling I have right now.

Michael is the type of person where you can have a "talk" with him, and even yell at him, and even maybe have an argument, and the next day (sometimes that very same day) he will expect everything to be just dandy. As if to say, "What, you're still mad at me? But that was yesterday." He's been eroding away my good regard for a long time, so it's going to take the same amount of time on good behavior to get my good regard back. I don't think he understands this.

And according to my estimation, "good behavior" hasn't even started yet. The issues I've mentioned here are not an all-inclusive list, to be sure.

I haven't been writing about this because I don't want him to read it and get his feelings hurt. But dammit, MY feelings are hurt - have been GETTING hurt for months now - and this is my journal, and I'm not saying anything OF him that hasn't been said TO him, so here I am.

I feel a little bit better now.

Labels: blogthings, Calvin, headspace, journal, kids, misc

Posted by Laura at 1:57 PM | Permalink | Comments

loloz! My take on the lolcats.

Labels: blogthings, humor, pets, photography

Posted by Laura at 1:40 PM | Permalink | Comments

Labels: blogthings

Posted by Laura at 3:33 PM | Permalink | Comments

Crystal interviewed ME because she loves ME and only ME and no one ELSE but ME except maybe her dog Moose.

1. I’ve read your goddess journal with regard to your illness (btw, update it more, I am so sure!) and want to know: how are you feeling? How are things with your health?

I am feeling much, much better. The proton pump flux capacitor photon torpedo inhibitors (aka: Protonix) seem to be doing the trick with the ol' pancreatitis. I haven't had any caffeine or alcohol since April 1st. Or jalapenos, or raw onions, or really anything else that encourages the pancreatitis to flare up. I shall continue to behave myself until the end of July, at which time a) the doctor says I should be fine to re-introduce the "no-no" items in moderate quantities; and b) Calvin and I are going to the Oregon Brewer's Festival and all non-drinking bets will be off.

On Monday I'm getting the much-delayed MRI, just to make sure it's just ("just"! Hah!) pancreatitis, and not something else like stones in the bile ducts and whatnot.

2. How did you meet your loving man?

Calvin and I met at work, and the sheer odds that we met at all are staggering. I had just moved 3000 miles to Arizona. I got a temp job working at AcronymCo, for a construction company building one of their office buildings. Calvin worked in Facilities for AcronymCo itself, and was one of the folks assigned to the new building project. My boss very randomly assigned me to go out to the newly constructed Mechanical Support Building and monitor the building controls alarms coming in as the systems were set up. Calvin was the go-to guy on AcronymCo's behalf for these systems. So I sat in the MSB office and called back alarms via the walkie talkie, and he came in and sat down at another workstation. We chatted and flirted, he typed "696969" on the calculator I was using and slid it over in front of me (SUCH a Calvin move you have no idea), I laughed at his dorky audacity, and it was all over but the cryin' at that point.

For those of you following along at home, yes I met him very soon after moving to Arizona, and yes that means that I was still married at the time to X(m), and Calvin was still married to X(f). But this is indeed how we met.

3. Which is better, America’s Next Top Model or Project Runway, and why? Answer wisely.

Oh geez. There's going to be trouble in our innernet lesbian marriage now. Crystal is NOT going to be happy to find out that I don't watch either one of these. Reality shows just pretty much drive me crazy. I can't see the point to them at all.

4. Is Oprah Winfrey Jesus or the Devil, and why?

Well, Crystal, since you said your own self that you and Jesus are one and the everlovin same, that must make Oprah the Devil by default. Do you see? I PAY ATTENTION.

5. Name the last three books you read that really impressed you---NON-FICTION.

A Year in the Maine Woods by Bernd Heinrich. I really enjoyed this book for multiple reasons. First, of course, is because it's about Maine. As I grew up in the Maine woods, the subject matter resonated with me. The second appeal the book had for me is that I have always wanted to take a hiatus from life and just escape to a simple place and live a simple life. Heinrich immerses himself in the natural world, the simple culture, and the rhythms of the forest for an entire year. Reading about it made me jealous of his opportunity, to be honest.

America - The Book by John Stewart. This counts as non-fiction, right? Even though Stewart pretty much bastardizes historic fact? This thing had me laughing my ass off throughout. I mean, just the fact that the layout, dimensions, and even the paper it's printed on is EXACTLY like a high-school history book, was hysterical. Then there's all these little asides (i.e.: "see fig. 1") about the personal (and questionable) life and motivations of historic people... well, not everyone will "get" this book, but it appeals to my sense of humor. And John Stewart is damnsexy.

River Town: Two Years on the Yangtze by Peter Hessler. I bought this book because I was doing a paper on the Yangtze River for my college class on Pacific Rim culture. I really didn't expect to like this book as much as I did. It's about two young men in the Peace Corps that went to Fuling, China (along the Yangtze River) who stayed for two years as teachers at the local college. They were very American and foreign (the first foreigners to be in that area of China for 50 years), and hijinx ensued as they tried to fit into the local culture.

And you all thought I only read trashy romance novels. Shame on you.

Okay! If anybody would like me to interview them, leave me a comment or shoot me an e-mail!

Labels: blogthings, Calvin, journal, misc, Op:Goddess

Posted by Laura at 11:24 AM | Permalink | Comments

I seem to be getting all of my fun links from Dooce lately.

Check this out. Who's the good puppy! Such a good puppy! Snoofie snoofie snoof!

Labels: blogthings

Posted by Laura at 3:55 PM | Permalink | Comments

Stolen from Ed Kaz, whose answers I couldn't improve upon if I tried, and so I won't. Here is my humble rendition.

1. Post a picture that is worth a 1000 words.


Courtesy of Born Rich.

2. Do you have a secret blog and if so why? If not, why not?

A secret blog is tempting, so I can write the truth about all of the people I can't write the truth about here. Heh. Got you thinking that YOU'RE one of them, huh? Psyche your mind!

3. Write out three wishes for other people and say why you wish those things.

I wish Jerry Springer's "guests" would just stop fucking their cousins.
I wish the Arizona Cardinals would get their act together.
I wish George Bush would consider a lobotomy.

4. If you had to make something with a grapefruit and two rubber bands what would it be?

Forget snakes! That's a wicked way to take out terrorists on an airplane.

(Heh. I used "George Bush" and "terrorists" and "airplane", I wonder how long it will take the CIA to search this site?)

5. Did you ever practice french kissing, and if so, on what, or how?

Yes, on a boy, and we worked on it until we got it right.

6. What is the most disgusting thing you've ever eaten?

Haggis. I was forced.

7. What is the most feminine (if you are a man) or masculine (if you are a woman) thing about you?

Apparently, the way I walk.

8. If you have pets, what are their names, and what inspired you to name them that?

Oz - after the character on Buffy (much as the family likes to think it's after Mr. Osbourne)
Gadget - he's tiny, he's tuny, he's just a little loony. Small dogs call for names that call small things to mind, I guess.
Gypsy - I just always knew I'd name a beagle Gypsy if I ever had one
Cheeto - because he's got coloring under his chin that looks like Cheeto dust
Lucy - after two of my favorite characters; "While You Were Sleeping", "50 First Dates". Because we originally thought she was sweet (well, for a lizard). Natch.
Water Dragon - umm... we still haven't named it.
Kali - I don't know why Marie named the snake thusly.

9. Write a three line story about a time you were caught doing something wrong.

I didn't do it.
Nobody saw me do it.
You can't prove anything.

10. Using roughly 50 words, say nothing.

curmudgeon, lackadaisical, monstrosity, blank, forgo, pontificate, tiny, fabricate, ostentatious, placebo, guile, knickerbocker, rant, fade, masquerade, platform, zodiac, verily, toothsome, tallywacker, pillowcase, fern, hungry, probability, zounds, heretofore, onomatopoeia, flummox, recalcitrant, lascivious, perfidy, ancillary, paper, bulbous, concentrate, dome, feathers, mathematician, tchotchke, contemporaneous, morose, fantasy, petal, ceramic, hottentot, purple, franchise, kitchen, ineffectual, draconian.

11. Tell us about the worst job you've ever had.

Drive thru chickie at Burger King. In Maine. During the winter.

12. Create a new breed of human. What does it look like? What does it do? How does it procreate?

It can fly, live entirely off of junk food, and procreate just the same way we do now, cuz I can't think of any better way to do it!

13. What do you think is the biggest threat to humanity right now?

Indifference.
Kevin Federline.
Mentos commercials.

14. Tell us about what your dream job would be.

Patrick Dempsey's wardrobe assistant.

15. Who is the last person you wanted to kiss?

Wanted as in I did, but didn't want to? All of my barley-water-and-moth-ball-smelling relatives when I was a kid.

16. How do you eat an oreo?

Twist it apart, eat the naked side first in one bite, then bite the other side in half, masticate, swallow, repeat with other half.

17. What would you say is your defining characteristic?

My sunny nature and outgoing personality. Bastids.

18. What is your cause?

For everyone to completely understand and come to cherish the wonders that are Funions.

19. Link one site that you have found that is useful or that makes you laugh

USEFUL

MAKES ME LAUGH

Labels: blogthings, meme

Posted by Laura at 5:49 PM | Permalink | Comments

Create your own Friend Quiz here

Labels: blogthings, meme

Posted by Laura at 5:32 PM | Permalink | Comments

I've posted a few new pics over on Flickr, and I've begun listing the books I've read this year on the sidebar - scroll down below my "things" under "Stuff". Thanks to Jen and the 50 book challenge community over at LiveJournal for the idea!

Labels: blogthings, books, meme

Posted by Laura at 12:25 PM | Permalink | Comments

What Kind of Reader Are You? Your Result: Dedicated Reader You are always trying to find the time to get back to your book. You are convinced that the world would be a much better place if only everyone read more.
Obsessive-Compulsive Bookworm
Literate Good Citizen
Book Snob
Fad Reader
Non-Reader
What Kind of Reader Are You? Create Your Own Quiz

Labels: blogthings, meme

Posted by Laura at 2:35 PM | Permalink | Comments

Xmas Stocking

leave a gift for Laura your username: your gift: (30 characters or less) get your stocking

Labels: blogthings

Posted by Laura at 8:57 AM | Permalink | Comments